The Most Intimidating Men Since LBJ

As I mentioned Sunday, Lyndon Johnson was one of the greatest intimidators of all time. It was known as the Johnson Treatment: unrelenting mental and physical intimidation by any means necessary. Here are some other Treatments…

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The SUGE KNIGHT Treatment: Presently standing a murder trial for running over two men in a parking lot in Compton in 2015, took on leadership role as Bobby Brown’s muscle by employing negotiation tactics involving lead pipes, baseball bats and dangling Vanilla Ice off a 20th-story balcony until he signed away all publishing rights to “Ice Ice Baby,” having sampled music from Knight’s label without his permission.

The BOB GIBSON Treatment: Holstered a dozen or so pitches whose singular purpose was to intimidate batters crowding the plate. Among them were “two different fastballs, a couple sliders, a curve, a change-up, a hit-batsman, a brush-back and a knockdown.”

The MIKE TYSON Treatment: “From the moment I step in the ring, I never take my eyes off of my opponent. I keep my eyes on him, I keep my eyes on him, I keep my eyes on him. And once I see a chink in his honor—one of his eyes move just a little—then I know I have him. Even when he gives me that piercing look again in the center of the ring, he already made that mistake—he looked down for one tenth of a second, which means he’ll fight hard for the first two or three rounds, but I know I already broke his spirit.”

The BOBBY KNIGHT Treatment: Choked Indiana University’s communications director after a negative press release; assaulted a Puerto Rican police officer while coaching Pan American Games in San Juan; threw a chair across the court to protest a referee’s call during game; told Connie Chung, “I think that if rape is inevitable, relax and enjoy it”; choked, punched and mock-bullwhipped Indiana players Michael Prince, Neil Reed and Calbert Cheaney, respectively; threw a potted plant at a female secretary; attacked assistant coach Ron Felling by throwing him out of a chair after overhearing him criticizing the basketball program in a phone conversation; fired a shotgun in the direction of James Simpson after he asked Knight to stop hunting too close to his home; bid farewell to an Indiana University crowd by saying, “When my time on earth is gone and my activities here are passed, I want them to bury me upside down and my critics can kiss my ass.

The DONALD TRUMP Treatment: Why does Trump intimidate? To win. Jeb Bush has nightmares about Donald Trump, despite shaking his fists and declaring, adorably, how much he just HATES THAT BULLY!!

The JACK LAMBERT Treatment: Have a look.

 

—C.B.S.

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